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memories carved at the back of my brain
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
sad day..
hai. sad day today. lotsa things happen.
had our selection test today. everyone was suddenly so hardworkin. pickin up on timin n all those. was feelin stressed if i dun go thru hl will surely kill me after the 2 long days of practice after sch to save my horrendous timin. din practise much though. then some idiot came n took my guitar away claimin its hers. i dun like her anyway.
went in with xh n v. was quite okie except for my timin where i forgot at some parts ( partially i followed xiaohui so we play wrongly. ) then my chords wrong! arghx. its quite clear though others say they nv hear. but sam was sittin next to me. arghx.
after tat went to crash year1s. they are quite nice pple la. but they ask me to play i malu cox keep playin wrongly as my fingers hurt a lot after this few days of massive playin. heard a veh surprisin rumour in my og. haha.
the moment has come. the selection results are out. some pple were cryin n veh disappointed since they practised so long over the nov hols n these few days. those whom i see them put in a lot of effort to learn din get in. its really veh sad. then the one who i dun like n is in my grp n normally dun prac much n loves to bitch n crap got in. wad de. so unfair where there are betta pple than her who should have gotten in. i dun believe it when i hear it. i nearly wanted to scream when i hear it. damn it. but hav to base the results on today's test. bet all the exco are feelin veh bad esp the CIs who chose the pple. i was kinda feelin a bit guilty though when i did played a veh small part in decidin pple n i shouted at mx w/o askin wad happen ( he kicked the door n whamed veh loudly but i din noe that he was veh disappointed. )
the feelin suddenly turned veh veh gloomy. was wonderin whether its really a veh practical world where those really who has a musical advantage / exp will always overide one who works veh hard n put in heart n soul in learnin music. is life really like that when u put in atmost efforts but u are not rewarded? life is nv fair i guess.
after that something happened which i wun wan to say n it dampens my mood further. gals are always the losin end of any broken relationship.
but one thing that makes me feel betta. at least i noe someone that respects me n i respect the person too. that kinda cheer me up though. =) rarely to hear pple say they respect me cox i dun think i earn pple's respect since i m loud n unreasonable at times. =)
hope tmr will be a betta day =)
8:52 PM
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